It’s 1 am again, the world around is frozen
Fatigue clashes with drive, passion, bitterness
Keep going, you think, for there is always more to learn
1 more page, 5 more pages, then 10 more
and another hour has vanished forever
The virus is fascinating, is it not?
Neither living nor dead, yet ever present
Sometimes lytic, sometimes lysogenic
Hiding, taking over, and growing outward
until it has consumed the host entirely
The virus is like a feeling of dejection
Neither absent nor fully present
Sometimes you bend to its will, crumbling
Sometimes you raise your head to face it
and stare it down with a sad smile
It’s 2 am now, the stillness has broadened
Windows shuttering closed, fog looming in
Keep going, you think, for there is still more to learn
Gel electrophoresis separates bands by property…
just as the conscious separates sleep from wakefulness
Hey all, this is a poem inspired by my potentially unhealthy study habits over the past few days. Studying bio has become my life as I rush to prepare for a competition in ~17 days time. My reading pace is a little slow because comprehension comes at the price of slowing down for a moment, breathing and reflecting.
Sometimes though, the late hour begins to muddle your thoughts. When I finally hit the section on viruses yesterday, some of these thoughts were beginning to mix with some internal feelings, and I realized simultaneously how dangerous they could be just how unaddressed feelings could spread and consume you.
I’m struggling with a part of my identity––one that reminds me that try as I might, failure is often a result. Because as significant as effort is, at the end of the day it’s not solely the journey, but also the destination that matters. While I know that hard work and cooperation with others can compensate for my weaknesses, it’s challenging to quell the feelings of frustration that sometimes boil up.
Anyways, sorry for missing a post a few days ago…I’ll do my best to be active, but I hope you understand when I’m not.
Thank you for reading, and have a great day